I came home as someone else... Must have wished it on myself

i have NO TIME anymore.
and its really annoying.
lets see...
this weekend
friday: pep band.
long...boring...hurt my eyes.
saturday: lights "fantastic" parade.
dumb, none of us knew the song...
saturday after the parade: trumpet party that none of the trumpets showed up to...
sunday:stupid french semester project and cleaning.

now its monday already...
next weekend is hopefully girls night friday night, then early ish morning tree lot saturday and sunday.

i need to do some serious self discovery. i feel like ive just been letting life take me along these past few weeks, not putting any actual thought into anything, which just isnt okay with me.
im just now getting the time to upload the live in chicago cd. sad i know, ive had it since last monday.

She says "Can't you see me?"
"Can't you see me? Can't you see my walls are tumbling down?"
"Can't you see my walls are crumbling down?"
"Can't you see my sun stop spinning 'round?"
"Can't you see the sky turn black and brown?"
"Can't you see the moon is flashing round?"
"Can't you see me? Can't you see me? Can't you see me?"
No.

But there's a girl on car in the parking lot
says "Man why don't you take a shot?
Can't you see my walls are crumbling?"
And she looks up at the building
she says "I'm thinking of jumping"
She says she's tired of life
she must be tired of something

wow. round here is an amazingamazingamazing song.

im truly trying to be a better person.
its just hard...

sometimes you get sick of faking like everythings good. or okay. or not horrible.
and really things could be so so so much worse,
im just a naturally depressing person i guess. kinda sucks, people don't really like that...

oh well. i guess i just gotta keep trying...